Over the last few months, I couldn't help but think about how people would respond to my announcements about leaving the magazine and selling CrochetMe.com. I couldn't escape that although my reasons were so intensely personal, I'm a fairly public figure in the yarn world and I know from experience that some people have a tendency to think of me almost as their representative to it. So of course people might react to my decisions.
And so let me tell you how amazed I've been with your responses yesterday—in comments, on Twitter, by email. Not only did you make me feel understood and supported, you also seemed to relate personally in ways I hadn't anticipated.
We are creative people. All of us. And we don't often know what to do with ourselves in that respect. We know how to have a job and do it well, we know how to participate in family life, we know how to foster friendships. There are subtle and overt social rules for all of those things. But there aren't any rules about living creatively, are there? And rules for such a thing would defeat the creativity part, anyway.
But still. We're raised to be empowered to pursue the academic subjects that interest us, to go after satisfying and influential careers, to give back to our community. But when we're needing to be creative, when that creativity runs counter to the expectations we've placed upon ourselves and that others—tacitly or openly—place upon us, we're lost. Literally lost. We feel like we spin around and can't stop; we feel like the bottom is falling out from under us; we feel like we don't fit in, like we aren't understood, like we never will be.
I have come to accept that as long as I understand myself, that as long as I take a deep breath as I'm spinning around and the bottom is starting to recede, that as long as I trust myself, I can navigate a creative life happily and successfully. And so can you.
I definitely want to explore this more. What do you think?